After we get married we want nothing more than to spend every moment of our life with our partner. Becoming a mother completes the picture, although it is extremely time consuming. Our new life has begun, but does that mean that our old life has to end?
It’s very easy to get caught up in this whirlwind, but at the end when the dust settles and the honeymoon is over, you will wonder where your friends stand in your life – the ones that were always there for you, gave you strength when you were weak, brought sunshine into your life and contributed to making you who you are. As life progresses, our priorities definitely change. We are however, more than capable of being devoted wives, loving mothers and incredible friends. You can have it all; you don’t need to sacrifice one for the other. Keep a realistic balance between each and don’t neglect anyone – it is easily achievable. It is all these relationships combined that make you whole.
The balance comes when your friends are happy to see you find someone to share your life with. These friends might feel a little sad when the time they can spend with you is reduced, but they understand your new situation. They want to hear about your happiness and do not demand more time or attention than you can give. A partner who is comfortable with himself and confident about your feelings for him will encourage you to remain true to your friends. A husband who is glad to see your smile when a friend calls is a true blessing.
Becoming a wife and mom doesn’t have to prevent you from doing some of the things that you used to do before getting married. You just have to be wise and do them differently. Instead of meeting out for coffee, take advantage of your baby’s afternoon nap and invite your best friend over or grab a couple of takeaway cups from your favorite cafe and let the baby sleep in the stroller while you walk and chat.
You will still have things in common with your single friends such as a hobby you both enjoy, going to the gym, going shopping, etc. You may also enjoy talking about the latest fashion, your favorite TV shows or the latest books you have read, just as husbands need their friends to talk about the big game and the next car they are dying to buy. Keeping your single girlfriends included in your new life will make them happy. They can help you organize birthday parties or provide a fresh angle on how to handle an issue with baby. You are actually doing them a favor and preparing them for when it is their turn to experience motherhood (and of course when that time comes you will return the gesture with all of your experience). Spending time with your best friend can be a refreshing break from the routine we often find ourselves caught up in.
Talking with your friends who are moms is also very soothing. It can show you how normal your life and your schedule are at times when you may be feeling overly tired or busy. Sharing experiences with people who have been there themselves can be a relief. It’s easy to get along with friends that understand what you are going through.
Time management skills will ensure that you make the most of each day and fit in all that you desire. At the end of the day, surround yourself with friends that are supportive of your life, friends that have good morals, values and foundations, as they will influence you and your children. Great friends, true friends will accept you for who you are – unconditionally.
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